8.26.2009

5 Disappointing Moments in Horror


We all know what it feels like to be let down. Sometimes we are disappointed in filmmakers, in studios, in mainstream moviegoers, or maybe just the film industry in general. Here is a collection of random disappointments from the past five years or so in no particular order.

1) House of 1000 Corpses: I was promised body count and I didn’t get it.




After years of waiting to see Rob Zombie’s feature debut, it definitely wasn’t worth the wait. Caught up in post-production, studio swaps, and a whole lot of confusion, House of 1000 Corpses was an example of why filmmaking isn’t something you just pick up on the first try.

2) The Failure of Grindhouse : Rodriguez v. Tarantino


While I loved the idea behind Grindhouse and all that retro goodness, putting Rodriguez and Tarantino back to back only proved how boring QT movies are. I have a strong affinity for Planet Terror, but harness the opposite emotions towards Death Proof. The poor box office turnout for the double feature was undeserved. It was worth the 10 bucks to watch Planet Terror and leave during the intermission before the horror that is Death Proof began.




3)The Vampires of Twilight: Ughhhhhhh

Conversation between random young woman and myself:

“Becky, I think you might like Twilight. It’s like a horror film.”
Twilight isn’t exactly what I would consider horror.”
“Yeah, but it has vampires”
“Vampires that hang out with high schoolers and dress like emo-kids”

4) Afterdark Horror Fest: 8 Films I wouldn’t die for.


The marketing behind the Afterdark releases fooled us into thinking we would be seeing some truly disturbing, independent horror films. On the contrary, half of them are so tame they could be confused as a child’s bedtime story. Kudos to the concept of giving new directors a shot, but you can’t say you weren’t disappointed.

5) Masters of Horror: I could be a karate “master” under these qualifications.

I have no issue with the first season, but during the 2nd season, they just got desperate. If I’ve never heard of the director, chances are he is not a “master” of the horror genre. Making one or even two horror films does not qualify you as a master in my book. Take Brad Anderson as an example. Sure he directed Session 9, which was fantastic, but he also directed Next Stop Wonderland… And Ernest Dickerson. Yeah, we all love Demon Night, but I definitely had to stop by IMDB to figure out who he was. He’s been too busy directing TV to make my horror radar.

14 comments:

  1. I liked House of 1000 Corpses…

    The 8 Films to Die For is obviously a marketing ploy, but some of the films have been good, Tooth and Nail was enjoyable, I think.

    Masters of Horror was a great series, I own the DVDs for all the episodes.

    The one disappointing horror moment for me was my first viewing of "Hostel", I thought it was awful and DID NOT live up to the hype!

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  2. lol most excellent list, what I found most strange about Masters of Horror was that the obvious non-masters like Rob Schmidt who had only directed Wrong Turn in genre actually produced one of the better episodes in Right to Die. Got my giggle in for the day, thanks Becks!

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  3. What an excellent idea for a post. I completely share your lack of enthusiasm for 'House of 1000 Corpses' - a complete washout. And 'Deathproof'? I just wanted those irritaing characters to steal the fucking car and do some stunts. Not wax lyrical on 'should we steal the car'. Extremely dull. Also, I'm from New Zealand - Zoe bell's caricatured accent annoyed the hell out of me. I should be used to it you'd think. Mate.

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  4. The first two I don't agree with you on at all, the last three however, you couldn't be more right about.

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  5. Can't really disagree with any of these, though maybe for slightly diffrent reasons on a couple of them, such as Grindhouse which is more to do with the fact that the UK never got to see both films together, despite getting huge amounts of hype that we would, it was a kick in the teeth for them to be seperated. I liked "Death Proof" but then I'm a big fan of Tarantino, so kinda biased in that regard.

    God how I hate "Twilight" especially the fact that they shimmer instead of the whole bursting into flames thing. I've never been a huge vampire fan and this series doesn't help to change it.

    Good post!

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  6. Totally agree with everything on the list. I maybe have seen 1 good flick from all the After Dark Horrorfest movies combined.

    As for Twatlight, can we just have Ms. Meyer and all of Utah seceded?

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  7. Finally! Someone agrees that Death Proof was boring, boring, boring! Friends kept telling me, Man, that movie was about the dialogue. Well, if so, why didn't it just release as an audio CD?

    ADH films have a 98% disappointment rate for me.

    There are only 4 total MoH movies I consider worth watching.

    You just read my review of 1,000 Corpses earlier this week, so you know.

    Twilight, give me a break. I read way more than I watch movies, and unfortunately it's not as if something was lost in translation from book to film (Stephen King adaptations usually suffer this tragedy).

    Great list! Thanks for posting it.

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  8. Agreed! Death Proof blew guys, I cant believe some "horror people" liked it. Even QT fan (i count myself as), should have threw up and tried to burn down QT's house. BTW DEMON NIGHT RULES! lol I didn't think House was too bad, just.... confused lol.

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  9. B-Movie Becky,

    I work for After Dark Films and wanted to alert you to our 2010 HorrorFest, two films announced, a third about to drop and more to come in the next few months. Since 2007 (whose HFest you didn't love!), we've presented HorrorFest 3 (in Feb, 2009) and now we're preparing for an awesome lineup (featuring some seriously scary, high quality horror flics!) We'd love to add you to our press list so that you can receive announcements and materials to share with your readers. Yours, Fred Greene, fgreene@afterdarkfilms.com

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  10. Wow! Thanks for all the comments guys. Glad to get some opinions thrown around.

    I didn't hate House of 1000 Corpses, but I was disappointed. And yes, there are a few good films in the MoH and ADF lineups, but all in all, I just don't like not getting what I've been promised.

    As for those that love these films, all I can say is one woman's disappointment is another blogger's treasure.

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  11. Wow. WOW! I agree with all of these, but jesus christ - how could anyone hate Death Proof?? That film is awesome in so many ways. In fact, it made me mad that I'm nowhere near talented enough to produce that kind of art. And I love horror films, so you're gonna have to start believing.

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  12. GGG, It's pretty funny how everyone can be so polarized over Death Proof. I'm glad you liked it so much! I wish I was in that boat, so then the entirety of the Grindhouse experience would have been cooler.

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  13. Word. I'm sad you didn't enjoy it, especially as I found it so moving. Never mind, we can always unite over other movies!

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  14. Sorry, I love Tarantino and Ken Russell even more. Hated Death Proof. They talk for an hour, then a quick action scene, then another one hour of talk, then another action scene. I agree it was all about the dialogue, there was nothing else!!

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