3.03.2011

10 Horror Blogger Confessions


1. I'm not a tool. I won't be persuaded to like a film just because it caters to horror fans; I will judge it on its own merits. The only exception is campy films full of gore and nudity made before 1990. Then, I can't help myself.

Did you know that a film can suck, but still be 
considered a classic if Linnea Quigley is in it?

2. I don't jump on any bandwagons. My opinions are my own. However, if the bandwagon happens to be an "edgy" film that hasn't been made cliché by film students yet, then I will gladly hop aboard. Also, wagons involving an intense hatred for something are much easier to ride in.

3. I respect everyone's opinion and encourage comments on my blog...unless you disagree with me, then you're an idiot and have no taste. Of course, I won't actually say that, I'll just tell you that you have "an interesting perspective" or delete your comment.

4. I love independent filmmakers, unless they're successful. Then they're a sellout, whose films never surpass their hype. I'd prefer them to stay homeless, so I can like their films without being called a lemming. 

Did you know that horror bloggers instantly think 
you're cool if you hate Adam Green?


5. Obscure films help validate my opinion, because it's one of the only opinions around. Screeners make me feel important.

6. I track my Google analytics and Followers list religiously. I also spam other blogs with useless comments like, "I liked that movie too. I think you'd like my blog, check it out!"  Still, I don't care about how many followers or hits I have. I do this because I love to write, but I do miss the Horror Blips rankings.

7. I like all of the big names in horror, but just to maintain an aura of objectivity and to garner some street cred, I choose one horror icon to tear down. Argento, Carpenter, Craven....one of you are on my hit list. 

8. Before I finish watching a movie, I've already started writing the review in my head. I take particular joy in thinking about witty remarks to place under the screen captures. Don't worry, I really am paying attention to the movie. 

9. I'm always most impressed by foreign films, regardless of the actual content. Because it is French, it is better. 

Did you know that nihilism and the French language combine
to create an automatic gush fest for bloggers?

10. Any ideas that don't fit into the horror blogosphere trope hold no weight with me. You can never mention the two evil R words: Republican and Religion. I'm all for tolerance, unless you believe in the R words.

7 comments:

  1. 1. I hate all action flicks unless it was done in the 80s for sure... agreed.
    2. My Wagon is filled with hate of p13 action! EWWWW
    3.Comment deleted
    4. James Cameron's films after Terminator are shit. I know what you u mean.
    5. I dont do screeners. Not indie enough.
    6. Whats google? is that like yahoo or msn?
    7. Ya I do the same about John Woo what a fucking HACK
    8. I do my reviews before i even watch it. Cover art and trailers are all u need.
    9. HONG KONG ACTION IS THE ONLY ACTION!!!!!!
    10. U forgot RETARDS always looking for sympathy. Also if you are in the tea party I want to burn you alive.

    ReplyDelete
  2. This is hilarious Becky! I think you'd like my blog. Check it out!

    ReplyDelete
  3. I'd think Adam Green was cool if he hated all of us!

    ReplyDelete
  4. I miss Horror Blips too even though I only got as high as #7. Secretly we are all jealous of horror blogs with more Google followers, twitter followers and comments. Cmon you know its true.

    But I know the cool horror bloggers got my back and I got theirs.

    So check out my blog too!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Cortez, I'll check out your blog if you check out mine...wait.

    Carl, Damn Adam Green for actually liking horror fans. If he were a jerk, it would be easier.

    Jeff, I do miss Horror Blips, even if the rankings were somewhat arbitrary. There's nothing wrong with good-spirited competition.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Becky - You forgot to add that people who leave demeaning/attack comments under "Anonymous", (for a film like REC 2 for example - wink, wink) are spineless bastards whose opinions shouldn't count. Make that one 10a.

    ReplyDelete

There was an error in this gadget